Becoming Independent

Today we are going to discuss becoming independent. We know that becoming independent is a part of growing up that can often cause stress and friction between families. As youth get older they often crave independence and it is oftentimes a struggle for caregivers to determine if the youth are ready for this independence. So what do you think about becoming independent? Would you consider this to be a risk factor or a protective factor for youth substance misuse?

If you guessed Protective Factor, then you are correct! I have had numerous conversations around this topic with both youth and caregives. This topic is addressed in the parent workshop and the youth education we offer. I always start with the youth by having them identify how their role in their family has changed as they have gotten older. Most of the youth report that they do have more responsibilities in their family now than they did when they were young, but that not much else has changed. Most youth tell us that they do not feel like they have a say in the decisions their parents make for them. Parents on the other hand usually feel that by giving their child more responsibilities they are helping them become independent. This is absolutely true. Responsibility absolutely helps our children become more independent.  However, I feel that what the youth are saying is that we are not giving them independence in the areas of their life they crave.

Most youth want to be able to feel like they are able to make decisions for their own life. I encourage parents to look at making decisions in the same way they would look at teaching their child to do their own laundry or to cook a meal. Making decisions is a skill. Just like with teaching our children how to do laundry we first teach them how then we give them an opportunity to practice. It is important to look at making decisions the same way. First, we must teach our children how to make decisions. We can begin doing this at a young age. It may start simple by making a decision about which snack they would like to have or which show they would like to watch. As they become older decisions become more complex. There may be more than one option and we can also teach our children that all decisions have consequences, some good and some bad. We can use these life examples to teach our children how to consider all options and consequences and make the decision that is best for them. Here is where the hard part comes in. After we have taught our children how to make decisions, we must let them PRACTICE making decisions. I’m a mama, I know sometimes this is hard because I see the situation and I know that my child’s decision may hurt them in some way and my instincts tell me to step in and save them from that hurt by making the right decision for them. However, if I am always the one making decisions for my child, they will never truly learn how to do this for themselves.

Now, onto the point. Becoming Independent is actually considered a Protective Factor. Youth who are allowed to become independent and feel that they can make decisions for themselves are LESS likely to misuse substances. Often times when youth are using substances they may be doing so to try to make themselves seem or feel or look more grown up. If we allow our children to feel grown up in other ways such as making decisions for themselves, then it is highly possible they won’t need to turn to substance use to get that same feeling. Not sure where to start? Allow your child to become a part of making decisions that affect their lives. Let them help choose where the family is going on vacation, what the family is going to eat for dinner, what extra-curricular activities they want to be involved in, or even when they are ready to get a part time job and how they spend their money.

In summary, just remember that our children need our guidance to learn how to make decisions that will allow them to live a healthy and happy life. In allowing our children to practice making decisions we are fulfilling their desire to become more independent in a healthy way and are also decreasing the likelihood they will misuse substances.

Risk Factor: Early Substance Use

Early Substance Use is a Risk Factor for youth substance use. The younger a youth is when they begin using substances the more at risk they are from continuing to use or having issues with substance use as they grow older. It is important to note that while the use of legal drugs such as alcohol, tobacco, or even marijuana has become an accepted behavior from adults, these substances effect young people in a much different way and pose a whole different set of risks to them. Research shows that the human brain is not fully developed until a person is in their mid-twenties. Substances such as alcohol, tobacco, marijuana, and other drugs have completely different and long lasting effects on brains that are not fully developed. Substance use among teenagers can cause difficulty with learning, impulse control, and decision making. Research also shows us that youth become addicted to substances more easily than adults.

Don’t believe me? Just ask a lifelong cigarette smoker how old they were when they started smoking. According to the CDC website 9 out of 10 adults who smoke cigarettes daily began smoking by the age of 18. A recent study found that people starting to smoke regularly at age 18 to 20 years have higher odds of nicotine dependence and lower odds of smoking cessation than people starting to smoke at age 21 years or older. Even those these statistics are related about tobacco use, the research shows the same patterns for other substances.

The following chart depicts data specifically from Butler County, Missouri.

Substance—Average Age of First Use

Alcohol—12.7935

Cigarettes—11.7498

Marijuana—13.7015

Prescription Drugs—11.6324

Over the Counter Drugs—11.5403

E-Cigarettes (Vapes)—13.1788

I’ll be honest, when I first read these statistics I was a little shocked. This data shows us that most youth who use substances begin using during or even BEFORE they are in Junior High School. I also began to wonder, what would happen if they didn’t? Would they be more likely to graduate high school or go to college? Would our legal system have less drug offenses?

In summary, it is important to remember that just because a substance is legal for an adult, does not mean that it is safe for youth to use. The earlier a youth begins using substances the more likely they are to have to deal with substance use issues in the future. Also, it is okay for you to be the parent who breaks community norms or family traditions involving youth substance use.

Sources

Ali FRM, Agaku IT, Sharapova SR, Reimels EA, Homa DM. Onset of regular smoking before age 21 and subsequent nicotine dependence and cessation behavior among US adult smokers. Prev Chronic Dis. 2020; 17:190176. DOI: http://dx.doi.org/10.5888/pcd17.190176.

STATE System Tobacco MLSA Fact Sheet | CDC

Protective Factor: Recognition for Positive Behavior

Tis’ the season for hearts and kisses, chocolates and flowers, romance and love. Regardless of your feelings towards the quickly approaching Valentine’s Day, this is a time we are reminded of one of our most basic human desires, love. Where does love fit in with drug and alcohol prevention? It is foundational.

We have discussed in past blogs that one of the most foundational protective factors is bonding with family, friends, and caregivers. The protective factor we are going to be addressing today is a key element to build the bonds between parents/ caregivers and children. Today we are going to be talking about recognition of positive behavior. When our children are little we recognize them for their positive behavior all the time. We are constantly asking them to do things, then cheering them on when they behave in a way we want them too. Parents of young children can frequently be heard saying things like:  “Yay! You used the potty”, “You put your clothes on all by yourself, you are such a big kid!”, or even “Wow! You did such a great job putting your toys away.” However, as our children get older our expectations change, and as these expectations change the way we speak to our children also starts to change.

We know that bonding and recognition for positive behavior are both protective factors that can decrease the likelihood that our children will use drugs and alcohol. If you were to tell your teenager that you are proud of them for dressing themself, they may look at you as though you have lost your mind. So it is important to note that as our expectations change, so will the things we recognize our children for. When the kids are little we praise them for skills we want them to master such as dressing themselves and potty training. As our children get older, we can still apply this same principle. We should recognize them for any skill they are trying to master. At school we can recognize them for academic skills such as a doing well on a test, getting a good grade in a class, or graduating high school. It is also important that we recognize our children’s contributions as they learn new skills within our home. We could recognize them for helping with the laundry, cooking a meal for the family, being kind to their siblings or helping with the yard work.  Another skill that a lot of us may not consider is the skill of developing healthy relationships. We can recognize our children for being a good friend, being kind to others, being compassionate, and even making new friends. The list of things we can recognize our children for could go on and on. I challenge you to find one positive thing you can recognize your child for every day, and just watch. As you begin to recognize your child for positive behavior, you will most likely find that they will begin recognizing others for their positive behavior as well.

Today I hope that you will take this away from this blog. As humans, we thrive in situations where we feel loved and appreciated. As children get older the way we speak to them often changes, but our children and teenagers still need to hear that we are proud of them and that they are doing a good job. This positive recognition of behavior strengthens family bonds, reinforces positive behaviors, and can ultimately decrease the likelihood that your teen will use substances.

Protective Factor: Belief in the Future

 2023 is officially upon us! Every year around New Year’s my newsfeed on social media is filled with people making resolutions of things they will do differently in the coming year. This year alone I have seen posts of people making commitments to lose weight, read more, work less, get their finances in order, and eat healthier. But why? Why are we all so caught up in making changes for the New Year? Simple, we all want to believe that the future will be brighter and that the new year will be better than the last. I’m sure you are wondering what all my rambling about New Years resolutions has to do with preventing substance use. Today’s blog will address the protective factor of belief in the future.

Just like adults, children and youth need to believe that the future ahead of them is going to be bright. We always ask children what they want to be when they grow up, and many have big dreams to become a doctor, a famous singer, or a veterinarian. As children get older these answers change and for some youth they really have no idea what they want to do with their lives. This can lead to a overwhelming and depressing stage, which puts youth at a higher risk of using substances.

Youth who have goals and ideas of things they would like to achieve in the future are at a lower risk for using substances. These youth are often excited about their dreams and don’t want to do anything to jeopardize the possibility of reaching their goals. These goals may be maintaining a relationship, having a family, going to college, moving away from home, or starting a career. The goals give the youth something to work for and belief in the future. This belief serves as a protective factor that makes youth less likely to use substances.

Now that we have discussed why having a belief in the future is important let’s talk about what you can do as a parent to help your child develop a healthy belief in the future. It is important to help your child find things that they love. Whether these be hobbies, a potential career, or the ability to build healthy relationships. Discovering a passion comes much easier for some young people than others. Encourage your children to get out in the world and find a part time or summer job, this can teach them so much about the kind of work they want to do and sometimes motivate them by finding out the type of work they definitely don’t want to do. There are several vocational assessments available online that your child can take to get some ideas about what kinds of jobs they may be good at or may be interesting to them. Job shadowing is something that can be very beneficial if your teenager has a career they think they might be interested in. You can set up job shadowing by contacting professionals and asking if they would be willing to let your child job shadow. If you are struggling to make a connection, then reach out to your child’s school guidance counselor and see if they can help. You can also attend a job fair or a college fair with your child. Even if your child is not actively searching for a job or college at this time, it is helpful for them to see all of the different opportunities available to them.

Once your child has developed a reasonable goal for the future then it is time to do some planning. I encourage you to sit down with your child and write a SMART Goal, then make a list of steps needed to achieve that goal. I have included an example below.

SMART Goal: Rachel will graduate and become a Registered Nurse by May 2026.

Step By When? Complete

Rachel will graduate high school with a GPA of 3.5 or higher. May 2023

Rachel will apply to 3 colleges. January 2023

Rachel will be accepted and enroll in college classes. June 2023

 Rachel will begin college. August 2023

Rachel will apply to Nursing Schools. May 2024

Rachel will begin Nursing School. August 2024

Rachel will graduate from Nursing School. May 2026

This model may not work for every goal, but you could come up with something similar. Just remember to take the overarching long-term goal and break it down into several small achievable steps. This gives the youth a road map to achieving their success and helps them to track their own progress toward achieving these goals. Developing a plan can help your child to see that their goals are achievable and keep a positive mindset about their future.

Protective Factor: Academic Achievement

Protective Factor: Academic Achievement

The end of 2022 is quickly approaching and with that comes a dreaded occasion for some parents and children. The end of the semester and the dreaded report card. During my time spent as an educator I saw it time and time again. Many parents are shocked to find that their children are not performing as well in school as they think they should be, or perhaps they think the teacher isn’t teaching as well as they should be. Regardless, parents are now worried about what to do to help their children in school. Today, we are going to discuss specifically how academic achievement relates to substance use.

High Academic Achievement is listed as a Protective factor, which is a factor in a child’s life that makes them less likely to use substances. However, LOW academic achievement is also a risk factor so we are actually going to be addressing both a risk and protective factor in this blog.

When students do well in school they are less stressed, better connected with peers and teachers, and have happier parents. So of course, these things make them less likely to feel the need to use substances. Also, students who have high academic achievement probably have strong self-efficacy and believe in a bright future. These are also protective factors that prevent substance use. It’s easy to see why if a child is doing well in school they are less likely to use substances.

Let’s talk about the children who aren’t doing well in school though. We know that low academic achievement is a risk factor among youth for several reasons. Some students may believe that because they are failing a class or struggling it may mean they aren’t smart enough to have a bright future which can be a heavy burden when thinking about life after high school. Low academic achievement may also cause stress between students and their families, especially if parents are upset about the way students are performing, this could weaken the family bonds. We also have to consider that stress itself is a risk factor, and for some students school is stressful and hard.

I think it is pretty easy to see the reasons that academic achievement can have an effect on youth substance use, but I feel like the real question is what can we do about it? Let’s begin by discussing what can you do if your child is doing well in school and has high academic achievement. If you will recall from the family bonds blog, the way we strengthen family bonds is through opportunities, skills, and recognition. If your child is doing well they obviously have the skills so we want to make sure that you are recognizing them for their hard work and efforts. Even if you have high expectations let them know that you are proud of them for meeting those expectations and make sure their hard work doesn’t go unnoticed. Also make sure to provide them with opportunities to continue to advance their skills, especially if school is something that comes easy to them. Are they ready to begin some college courses? Could you all read and discuss a book together? Are there other areas of life that interest them such as nature, government, or cooking? Encourage them to keep building skills and finding more opportunities for them to learn, this will strengthen their academic achievement in the future and help them be prepared for life on their own.

Now, for the more difficult situation to deal with. What can you do if your child is struggling in school or has low academic achievement? I think it is important to point out that all children are different and all situations are different so there is no one size fits all answer. I encourage you to start by doing 2 things. First, talk to your child. Ask them what is difficult or what they are struggling with. Is it a specific class, is it paying attention, are they struggling with something in their personal life that is affecting their school work? Next, talk to your child’s teacher. Ask questions. Why do they think your child is struggling in their class? Is it because they aren’t participating, are they sleeping in class? Do they suspect that your child might need additional help outside of class? Also, talk to other parents. Is this a class or subject that a lot of students are struggling in? After you have gathered all the information you can about why your child is struggling then it’s time to make a game plan. I would recommend sitting down with your child and discussing exactly what your expectation is for academic achievement and why you feel that way. Be reasonable. Is it probable or possible for your child to get an A in the class, or would you be okay as long as they earned a C? Is this class a foundational skill that’s going to affect their academic achievement in the future? Make a goal for your child. Then make a plan. One way to help your child is to set some rules and create a study schedule. Maybe they have to come straight home from school and study for 1 hour 3 nights a week before they can play video games. Maybe the schedule is staying at school to study in the library twice a week for 30 minutes after school. Do they need to cut back on their hours at work to accommodate more time for schoolwork? If sports are an issue, would it be best for your child to sit out a season while they focused on academics? Make a schedule that allows you to monitor. If you don’t get home until 5 from work it may not be setting your child up for success to expect them to study until you get home. Maybe it would be better for them to study from 5-6 in the kitchen with you while you cook dinner. There are so many factors that come into play, but make sure you are prioritizing the academic success, sharing expectations, and making a plan.

 If your child is struggling with a certain class or subject, ask the teacher if the school offers any tutoring. You can also ask the teacher if they would be willing to do private tutoring, or if there is another teacher at the school who teaches the same class that might be willing to tutor your child. Remember, teachers are highly trained professionals and always the best choice to tutor your child. If the school does not offer tutoring and there is not a teacher available then you may want to reach our to your local library or a professional tutoring organization. These can also be a great resource, but can be pricey.

I also want to address one more problem that I saw frequently as an educator. Some kids just struggle with school. It doesn’t seem to matter what the subject is because they just struggle with all of them. This could be a variety of reasons, but if your child falls into this category here are some tips. Meet with your child’s teachers and make sure they don’t feel there may be some type of learning disability. If there is any question, then REQUEST YOUR CHILD BE TESTED FOR SPECIAL EDUCATION. It is the law that if a parent requests this, then the school has to follow through with the testing. Don’t let it scare you, just because your child is tested DOES NOT mean they have to go to special education classes. Even if they do qualify for special education you do have the right to refuse it for your child. I do HGIHLY encourage you to have them tested though because the testing process is a process in which your child does lots of different assessments and can often identify why your child is struggling in school. Also, remember that not all successful people love school, and there are many careers that your child could pursue without attending higher education. Would your child thrive in a trade school? Are they good at working with their hands as long as they don’t have to sit down and read a book? Find something that makes your child happy and encourage them to pursue a dream that doesn’t require them to continue school after high school. Remember, belief in a bright future is a protective factor, so help your child see that future and not become overwhelmed by the pressure to succeed in a traditional school setting.

Risk Factor: Family History of the Problem Behavior

Risk Factor: Family History of the Problem Behavior

All our previous blogs have addressed Protective Factors, but this month we are going to take a look at a Risk Factor. As a reminder, risk factors are factors present in a youth’s life that put them at a higher risk for using substances. I prefer to write about Protective Factors because these are usually something we have a direct impact on and are things we can make an effort to change in our children’s lives. While some risk factors can be changed, others cannot. Sometimes I find myself thinking that if there isn’t anything we can do about it, then there isn’t a need to talk about it, and this isn’t necessarily true. If we look at the science of prevention, we know that we can reduce the likelihood of a youth using substances by limiting the number of risk factors in a child’s life and increasing the protective factors.

Today we are going to discuss the risk factor of family history of the problem behavior. This risk factor is simple, if people in a child’s family have struggled with a behavior such as substance use it is more likely that the child will also struggle with these same behaviors. This stands true for other problem behaviors such as teen pregnancy, delinquency, school drop-out, violence, and mental health issues like depression and anxiety. This could be caused by genetics, environment, or even the favorable parental attitudes toward the problem behavior. We’ve all heard the saying “you can’t change your family”, and while this holds true there are things we CAN do to limit this risk factor in our children’s lives. I encourage you to examine your own life and the lives of the family members who have direct and regular contact with your child. Do you and your family members set an example for how you want your child to behave? If yes, great! If not, would it be possible to change your own behavior? Or is it necessary to limit the amount of time your children spend with family members who engage in risky behaviors?

I understand that we can’t always change our families, or the people who are raising our children. I also know that sometimes we love people and want our children to know them. So if you fall into that boat, you may be asking what can I do? The answer is simple, BE AWARE. Know that because of the child’s family history they are at a higher risk for using substances. Increase the number of protective factors in your child’s life. TALK TO YOUR CHILD. Open the lines of communication. Talk about the problem or risky behaviors your family members have dealt with and how they have affected their lives. Tell your child your hopes and dreams for them and why it is important for them to make healthy choices. Watch for warning signs of substance use or other risky behaviors and intervene when necessary. No family is perfect; however the support of a family can help our children to live happy and healthy lives.

Strong Parental Bonding

Strong Parental Bonding

Protective factors are factors present in a child’s life that make them less likely to use substances. This month the protective factor we are discussing is strong parental bonding. Research shows that children who have strong bonds with their parents and caregivers are at a lower risk of using substances.

When I think about this statistic, I think about the why behind it. Why are children who are bonded to their parents less likely to use drugs? First, these children probably care about what their parents think and don’t want to do anything to break the bonds they have with them. Second, it could be because they feel they have support and trust from their caregiver, so they don’t need to turn to substances to handle their problems. Or it is possible that they look to their parents as role models and want to follow in their footsteps. I believe the reasons could go on and on and most likely it is a combination of many reasons that makes them less likely to use substances.

Most likely, you could have guessed that this would be a protective factor, but now to the part that gets a little trickier. HOW?  How do I build strong bonds with my child to prevent them from using substances? I think it is important to note that what may work for one child may not work for another child. It is important to meet your child where they are and recognize who they are to begin building bonds with them.

The Center for Communities that Care in Washington has a Parent Workshop called Guiding Good Choices. During this workshop the process of building bonds is broken down into 3 steps: Opportunities, Skills, and Recognition. These researchers suggest that the best way to build bonds with children is to make them feel like they are a meaningful and contributing member of the family. We must first give the children opportunities to be involved. This could be opportunities to be involved in family decision making, opportunities to be involved in the everyday tasks of taking care of a family, and even opportunities to spend time together. The next step is to provide the children with the skills they need to be successful when we give them opportunities. We must teach them how to do the tasks, how to make decisions, and how to bond peacefully with family members. Through giving our children the opportunities to be involved and teaching them the skills to be successful, this leads to the third step which is recognition. We must recognize our children for their positive contributions to the family. This could be through positive affirmations, a kind word, or even rewards of some kind. This lets our children know that we love and appreciate them and are thankful they are a part of our family. If you are interested in learning more about the process of strengthening family bonds I encourage you to contact us and sign up for our next Guiding Good Choices Parent Workshop.

Another way to build or strengthen our bonds with our children is through spending quality time together. I am completely aware of how difficult this can be, especially when the bonds are not strong. I encourage you to ask your children what they would like to do to spend time together. Of course, you may need to set parameters around their decision like a budget and schedule. You may be surprised at what they would like to do. I will give you a list of ideas of things that may be fun to do with your child and won’t cost a lot of money or time.

·       Bake a Cake Together

·       Take a Walk

·       Grow a Garden

·       Grocery Shopping

·       Do a Puzzle

·       Build Something

·       Read a Book

·       Watch a Movie

·       Rearrange the furniture

·       Visit a Park

·       Take a Drive

·       Attend a Community Event

·       Attend a Sporting Event

·       Play a Game

·       Plan a Vacation

·       Make a Dream Board

·       Shop at a local thrift store

·       Go on a Hike

·       Go swimming at a local lake or river

·       Go fishing

·       Go camping

·       Cook a Meal together

·       Start a new TV show together.

·       Decorate for a Holiday

Protective Factor: Opportunity to Build Skills

I was in college. My roommate and I had our own apartment. We both went to class, had jobs, and even paid our own bills. I will never forget the day I heard my roommate call back home to ask her mom to call and schedule her a doctor’s appointment. At the time I thought it was weird, but it wasn’t until later in my adult life I realized that this was a skill that my parents had taught me. I remembered vividly my mother telling me that if I wanted a haircut I could call and schedule the appointment myself. She told me what to say, practiced with me, and then stood there with me while I made the call. She gave me an opportunity to build my skills. 

As you learn more about protective factors you will find that many of them are connected and build upon each other. Today’s protective factor, opportunities to build skills, is one that is a foundation to so many others such as high self-esteem, academic achievement, self- efficacy, and bonding. It is so important that we give our children the opportunity to build skills so that they can feel needed as they contribute to our home.

Simply giving them the opportunity to build skills is not enough. We must first give them the opportunity, then we much teach them what they need to know so that they can be successful. I could tell my 3-year-old to do laundry and give him the opportunity by handing him all the dirty clothes, however that doesn’t mean he will be successful, and in this case giving him the opportunity would lead to much more harm than good. We must make sure that the skills we are helping our children build are developmentally appropriate and that we have taught them what they need to know to be successful.

When we give our children the opportunity to build skills, we are increasing their self-esteem and self-efficacy. Not only are we helping our child grow emotionally, but we are also preparing them for life on their own. If you are having trouble coming up with ideas of skills to help your child learn I encourage you to first think about all the things that must be done to keep a home running smoothly. Grocery shopping, dishes, laundry, yardwork, cooking, cleaning, and money management are just a few that come to mind. Are there any of these tasks, or at least parts of these tasks that your child could do or help with? You might just find that if you give your child the opportunity to build skills you may even have more time to do the things you would like to do!

I encouraged you earlier to consider household chores and help your children build skills in these areas. I also encourage you to help your children build skills outside the home as well. Below you will find a list of skills and ideas for things you or someone you may know could help teach your child.

·       Babysitting

·       Laundry

·       Washing Dishes

·       Budgeting

·       Making Phone Calls

·       Introductions

·       Making Plans

·       Cleaning

·       Public Speaking

·       Making a Menu/ Grocery List

·       Wants vs. Need

·       Run Errands

·       Making an Appointment

·       Crocheting

·       Sewing

·       Hunting

·       Yardwork

·       Gardening

·       Canning

·       Driving

·       Computer Skills

·       Reading

·       Time Management

·       Organization

·       Conflict Resolution

·       Self-Advocacy

·       Exercising

·       Fishing

·       Camping

·       Cooking a Meal

·       Volunteering

·       Training Animals

·       Photography

·       Decorating

·       Crafting

·       Auto Maintenance

·       Poetry

·       Playing an Instrument

·       How to say “No”

Protective Factor: Setting Clear Standards for Behavior

Would you be okay with your 11-year-old trying a sip of your wine at a special occasion? What about trying a vape with nicotine? What about drinking a beer with friends? For many of us it is easy to answer these questions when we are thinking about an 11-year-old. However, what if we asked these same questions about your 18-year-old. Do your answers change? In 2020 the Missouri Student Survey polled 474 students grades 6-12 right here in Butler County. 87.9% of the students surveyed said their parents feel it would be “wrong” or “very wrong” to smoke tobacco. Was your child one of those in the 87.9% that answered this way or were they a part of the 12.1% that did not believe their parents have a problem with them smoking tobacco.

As our children grow things change. While we may not be okay with our 3-year-old using the stove to prepare a meal, this could be normal and acceptable behavior for a 17-year-old. As caregivers it is important for us to recognize that our standards for behavior change as our children become more responsible and independent. It is also important for us to remember as caregivers that we cannot expect our children to know our standards for behavior if we are not clear about them ourselves. We need to have frequent conversations with our children about our expectation and be clear about how these change as they grow older.

One of the biggest and most influential protective factors we can give our children is setting clear standards for behavior. I want you to imagine for a moment that your child comes to you and asks you if they can play in the middle of the road near a busy intersection. Most caregivers would agree this is in no way acceptable behavior, and if your child asked your response might be something along the lines of “No, you could get hit by a car. It is not safe to play in the road.” Some caregivers may even go as far to set a healthy boundary. Perhaps something like “You can play inside the fence in the backyard.” This seems like common sense to most of us. We are not setting this standard to be mean parents we are sharing our standard with our children in an effort to keep them safe. I challenge you to apply this exact same form of thinking to substance use.

When we talk about substance use, sometimes it can be more challenging to talk about than playing in the road. It is possible that we aren’t clear ourselves on our standard, or possibly that we aren’t prepared to explain why we feel that way. When we talk to our children about substance use, we need to be clear on exactly what our expectation is. Does your child know how you feel about vaping nicotine? What about vaping substances without nicotine? What about hanging out with other kids who vape? It is important that you are able to share exactly how you feel about these situations, but also to explain WHY you feel that way.

I have come across many caregivers during workshops that are afraid to talk to their children about substance use because they use substances themselves. Maybe, they feel like their children won’t listen to them about not drinking alcohol because they frequently have a glass of wine with dinner. These can be extremely difficult conversations to have with our children, however avoiding the conversations doesn’t do anyone any favors. I encourage all caregivers to really examine your views and be willing to have open and honest conversations with our children. This includes talking about the fact that just because an adult uses substances doesn’t make it acceptable for a child to do the same. Perhaps your reasoning is that it is illegal for those under 21 to drink alcohol, or that at 17 their body is still developing, and alcohol can have much more harmful effects on developing bodies and minds. At the end of the day, we must recognize that favorable parental attitudes towards substance use is a risk factor that puts youth more at risk for using substances.

After you have spent some time reflecting on your expectations for your children regarding substances, I encourage you to write them down. Write the exact expectation for each child, along with a reason why you feel that way. Make sure you have a clear expectation about alcohol, marijuana, tobacco, and vaping. You can also include expectations about violence, stealing, lying, sex, prescription drugs, or any other risky behaviors. After you have reflected and written your expectations, use these expectations to have a conversation with the children in your life. Many caregivers have reported it is helpful to start out these conversations by talking about how much they love their children, and the kind of life they envision for them.

 If you need more help learning about ways to talk to your child about substances, I encourage you to visit "Talk. They Hear You."® Campaign | SAMHSA. Also, if you would like more information from the 2022 Missouri Student Survey about youth substance use in Butler County you can find that here. Butler County MSS 2022[7391].pdf

The SCIENCE of Substance Use Prevention

The SCIENCE of Prevention

“Am I doing this right?”

I’ve probably asked myself this questions hundreds or maybe even thousands of times and I have a feeling I’m not the only one. I find that I am constantly looking for reassurance from our children’s teachers, coaches, and medical professionals to confirm that my child is healthy, meeting all their developmental milestones, learning, and becoming the kind of person I wish them to be. However, when I work with families, I have found that one thing caregivers aren’t asking questions about is, “Am I doing all I can to prevent my child from using substances?” I feel like this is a question we afraid to ask because most of us are unsure of how to answer. Are there really things I can do to prevent my child from drinking alcohol, smoking marijuana, or using other drugs? Well luckily for us, research says YES! The good news is you’re probably already doing some of these things!

The Basics

A study conducted by Dr. Hawkins and Dr. Catalano in 1992 revealed that when they looked at youth who used substances and those who did not there were some very apparent patterns. These patterns were then identified as Risk and Protective Factors. Risk Factors were identified as factors in a child’s life that made them more likely to use substances. It was also noted that the more risk factors a child had the more likely they would be to use substances. Conversely, the researchers also identified Protective Factors, which did just the opposite. The more protective factors present in a child’s life the less likely they were to use substances.

So, here is where you come in. What can you do as a caregiver or community member to prevent substance use? It’s simple, REDUCE risk factors and INCREASE protective factors.

Throughout the course of this blog, we will be going in depth about various ways caregivers and community members can increase the protective factors and decrease risk factors in a child’s life. However, for those of you who simply cannot wait to learn more about risk and protective factors I have included a comprehensible list of the different risk and protective factors here. Risk and Protective Factors | Youth.gov

Now that we have introduced the concept of Risk and Protective Factors, I want you all to know that the first time I read this list I found myself in a panic. My child and many of the youth I work with have already experienced many of the risk factors listed, and while there may be some risk factors I can work to decrease, some of them are simply out of my control. I came across a concept during our Guiding Good Choices Parent Workshop that helped calm my fears. The Guiding Good Choices Parent Workshop teaches that it is important to remember that risk factors are “predictive” not “prescriptive”. Just because a child has one or even many risk factors present doesn’t mean that they will most definitely use substances. These risk factors are simply a predictor for youth who are at more risk of using substances. So, don’t panic. Even if your child or the youth you work with have many risk factors present in their lives you can still make a difference. As caregivers we can work to increase the number of protective factors regardless of the number of risk factors we feel we have working against us. The truth is, even though many of the risk factors remain out of our control, there are still MANY risk factors that we can do something about!

Where do we go from here?

Over the next several months, this blog will address many of the risk and protective factors, and what you can do as a caregiver to help. If you don’t feel like waiting and you feel that you need to learn more about risk and protective factors, I encourage you to contact the Butler County Community Resource Council and ask about the next Guiding Good Choices Parent Workshop. Guiding Good Choices is a 5 session Parent Workshop specifically designed for caregivers to prevent substance use among youth. Contact our Prevention Department to sign up for the next class! 573-776-7830.

Sources: @article{Hawkins1992RiskAP,  title={Risk and protective factors for alcohol and other drug problems in adolescence and early adulthood: implications for substance abuse prevention.},author={J. David Hawkins and Richard F. Catalano and J Y Miller}, journal={Psychological bulletin},year={1992},volume={112 1}, pages={  64-105   }

Welcome & Introduction

Blog #1

Welcome & Introduction

Hello! My name is Abby Hanner, and I am the Certified Prevention Specialist for the Butler County We Can Be Drug Free Coalition. I would like to begin by welcoming you to our coalition website and thank you for taking the time to read our blog. I understand you are most likely here out of concern for your own child, a child in your life, or the community. I want you to know that the members of the We Can Be Drug Free Coalition share the same concerns and have made it our mission to work to prevent the potential harm of alcohol, tobacco, and other drugs by empowering the youth in our community.

A Little About the Author

I have worked with children and youth for the past 10 years through coaching, teaching, being a child welfare advocate, and most recently through Prevention. I have a master’s degree in Education Administration and have been certified as a Missouri Prevention Specialist by the Missouri Credentialing Board. I also think it is important to note that I am a mother who has a passion to see her child grow up in a healthy community free from the harms of alcohol, tobacco, and other drugs.

About the Coalition

The We Can Be Drug Free Coalition has been in existence for over 20 years under the umbrella of the Butler County Community Resource Council, our local caring communities partnership. This coalition is made up many members of the community who share the passion to help empower youth to remain drug free. Our coalition is made up of school personnel, parents, counselors, businesses, law enforcement, and most importantly youth. You can learn more about the members of the coalition and how to become involved from our website. Our coalition has received funding form the Missouri Department of Mental Health to do this prevention work specifically in Butler County. The Coalition has engaged in numerous activities such as media campaigns, prevention programming in schools, parent workshops, and community education.

Our Hope

It is our hope that this website will become a resource to educate parents, families, and community members on the best practices to prevent youth substance use. The We Can Be Drug Free website is full of community resources, research-based articles on substances and youth substance use, opportunities to get involved, and information on the current events of the coalition. The goal of our blog is specific. We would like to educate people on the basic science of prevention and give parents, caregivers, and community members simple and practical ways to help prevent youth substance use.